Yes, Megan Wright, This Entry is About You

Don't you just hate it when you're at a lovely party and the dinner was great, the conversation sparkling and the company wonderful and then someone has to ruin it all by introducing some sort of game that brings your inner insane competitor to the surface and causes you to embarrass yourself in front of all party guests?  Me too.

On Saturday, I went to a party and was introduced to a game called Rock Band.  I was very uninterested in trying the drums or guitar part of the game, but as soon as I saw that microphone my heart started beating a little bit faster.  Here's a secret:  I am a great undiscovered Broadway star.  No, really.  Although my mother says that what I lack in talent I make up for in volume (rude) I think I make up for any pitch problems by being extremely enthusiastic and also in my dedication to my craft.  I sing in the shower and in the car and sometimes, without realizing it, in the grocery store.  No one has ever burst into applause at the end of one of my performances but I'm guessing that's because they're stunned at the vast talent exposed in front of them that is thus far undiscovered. 

Anyway, I was very excited to try it and tried to be patient as my cousin demonstrated for us how it was done.  Every fiber in my being wanted to grab the microphone from her, but I told myself to play it cool and waited patiently until she was done and then pulled it from her hands when she was almost completely finished with the final note.  At this point I was still trying to play it cool and not reveal that I had already begun imagining myself breaking records in this game, reducing the rest of the party guests to tears with the beauty of my voice and possibly getting a record deal.  I really do try to hide the insane competitor inside of me.  Most people I know are not aware that I time myself when I make my bed and try to beat my best time every day.  I kind of wish I was kidding, but alas.

So it soon became obvious that I would have a problem with Rock Band.  When scrolling through the available songs, I only recognized one or two.  My knowledge of rock is very limited.  If the Brady Bunch never covered it, odds are I have never heard of it.  I did keep my familiarity with the Brittney Spears song book quiet, as two of the party guests were musicians and I knew that I'd be shunned and possibly disowned.  I do know they were horrified that I had never heard of most of the songs.  I feel the same way when people don't know the name of "the other guy" from Wham! so I can relate.  Soon we switched to Beatle's Rock Band and I had a much easier time with song selection.

Yes, as you can see above, I took this very seriously.  Check out my death grip on the microphone and the passionate look in my eyes.  You really do believe I live in a yellow submarine in that picture, don't you?  That's called selling the song, my friend, and you either have it or you don't.  Also notice my sister Annie's condescending look.  I want her to remember that when I charge her for an autograph when I make it big.

It turned out that my cousin Megan was my biggest competition.  By that I mean she was the only one who considered it a competition at all because the other guests were normal.  I already knew we were a lot alike in the ego department as she told us earlier that evening that she constantly asked her boyfriend if every song he wrote was about her and that her favorite entries in his blog were the ones that mentioned her.  Still, I was unprepared for her strong desire to win.  We both warbled away as the rest of the party became increasingly uncomfortable.  I did feel like she wasn't using her talents wisely, as she is a ballerina and never produced a single pirouette, but still, she was a worthy competitor and I felt a strong sense of pride when I absolutely SMOKED her and kicked everyone's butt at the game.

I won!  I won!  I won!  I won!  I won!!!!!

Actually, I thought I hid my insanity pretty well, but I came back from the bathroom to find the whole party talking about what a psycho I was, so apparently I didn't play it cool quite as well as I thought.  Here's the thing, though- us superstars can't really be bothered by the jealousy of the little people.  I humbly understand that and I know Megan does too.  I can't shine any less bright just because the other stars are dull.  I will savor this victory, though, as it was hard-fought and I look forward to beating everyone again, just as long as it's not a ballet contest.

This is my cousin and I am not lying, she is a real ballerina.  Sometimes I fall when walking.  Some people have all the luck.

Although if I start practicing now, I guess you never know.