Casino of Shattered Dreams

Don't the people above look gloriously happy and full of the promise of wonderful possibilities and rewards?  That's my cousin Megan, her boyfriend Nate and my sister Annie after taking out the princely sum of $10 at an ATM at the Horseshoe Casino in lovely Hammond, Indiana.  As you can tell from Megan's thumbs up (in perfect form because she is a ballerina) we were all ready to win a fortune gambling in this glamorously decorated palace of gaming.  Luck be a lady indeed.

Megan put a dollar in a slot machine and went to town.  We were all overwhelmed with the sights and sounds of the casino- blaring jingles coming from the machines that sounded like revved up Sonic the Hedgehog background music and clouds of cigarette and cigar smoke from the many depressed-looking people feeding money into machines all around us.  Megan watched excitedly as the slot machine spun.  Within ten seconds, her dollar was gone.  She reached out... and punched the machine.

My stomach twisted immediately.  I looked up, saw four hundred cameras and had visions of that one scene in "Casino" where they put the guy's head in a vice and pop out his eyeballs.  (I've never seen the movie but I've had people describe that scene to me because most people are not kind and enjoy watching me squirm).  For a full minute, I thought we were going to die there in Hammond, Indiana.  Luckily, no security goons came and dragged us away to an abandoned warehouse.  Megan claims the punch was accidental.  I have my doubts.

I do not really like to gamble as my job is really volatile and I've lost large sums of money with just a few clicks of the mouse button.  Losing money in my spare time seems like it would be overkill.  I ended up playing a nickel slot machine, pressing the button and watching out of the corner of my eye as the elderly woman next to me blew her social security check.  When I looked back at my machine, it was flashing and emitting louder sounds than usual.  Guess who was the big winner?

The nine cents was my sister Annie's contribution.  I think she lost ten bucks, as did Megan and Nate.  There was no joy in Mudville at the end of our casino adventure.

I did gloat a little about being the big winner.  Shocking, I know.  On the way home, I bought everybody Arby's and I think we're still friends.  I hope I didn't get on Megan's bad side as I don't know if I can withstand her punch quite as well as the slot machine, and I have absolutely no idea where to buy a vice.